One thing about Saphina Carla, she is going to be honest.
Church Girl Culture vs. Christ (CGCC) is a book that starts a conversation about what I believe, many, if not all church girls experience or have witnessed. This books confronts Purity Culture with misogyny, traditionalism and theology sitting at the table.
Embedded in each chapter, we see threads of the heart of the author in a way that is raw yet seasoned with grace, like having a discussion with your older sister or best friend. Saphina does not try to change the readers mind or attack counter-ideologies, rather she offers another perspective, reigning you in to have a dialogue about this topic and its effects. She drops gems across every page from "our Godliness is not in our domestication" to "we need the whole counsel of God, not just Proverbs 31."
I was thoroughly challenged when in Chapter 3, when she mentioned having the belief that our spirituality was transactional. That God's purpose was to abide by our preferences, and in exchange for purity or celibacy, God would grant us a husband. But that is not how God works, God is not subjected to our will rather we are subjected to His. I appreciated Saphina's honesty in saying so, because I too sometimes find myself angry at God for not abiding to my will when I seem to be following the 'rules'. "I pay more tithe, where is my more money", "I study the Word, where are my visions and dreams", and of course "I'm not fornicating, where is my spouse."
She goes on to talk about the complexities of Christian dating. And dives deeper into the realities of pain and the humility of forgiveness. With each chapter showing us more and more who we are and what we truly believe, this book would not be complete without a call to action, and that is exactly what we get, Saphina challenges us to return to the basics, the foundation of Christ and to examine our hearts and come back to the Throne Room of Grace.
Ultimately, the goal of CGCC is not to point us away from Proverbs 31 or feminist ideologies, it is to point us to the FULL gospel. To address and break down destructive and harmful ways of thinking about dating, relationships, compatibility marriage and purity. Saphina is determined to leave no stone unturned.
I believe this book is for EVERY Christian woman, young or old, desiring a relationship or happily single. At the end of each chapter, there are conversation questions that evoke deep thought and introspection. This would be perfect book for small book club with friends you trust because of its raw nature.
Nonetheless, this book isn't for the baby Christian. I believe the context requires a certain level of spiritual maturity to be digested well and taken correctly. Even with a light-hearted undertone, unless you have a modicum of understanding of the true nature and characteristics of God, this book may raise more questions than answers.
Overall, I enjoyed this book and would recommend it to friends. Despite this book being directed to women, I would love to see a book of similar context for men. I think these are topics we should continually be discussing in safe spaces where concerns and stories can be shared and we can grow together.
Saphina Carla, thank you and Good bless you for answering the call and writing this book.